I Will NEVER Forgive You

Although I know that being unforgiving sucks the life energy out of a person, there are a few people whom I have never forgiven.

I have not forgiven my mother - for accusing me of taking her credit card and using it at an expensive restaurant when I was 17. As it turned out, it was her co-worker who had not received her renewal yet, and had used my mom’s for a business luncheon in a tight bind.

I have not forgiven the Pepper’s – they locked me in the basement of their house while babysitting for me when I was no more than 4 years old. I wouldn’t take a nap so they put me in the basement, shut off the lights and locked the door to the upstairs – after telling me that the boogie man lived down there. I believe this is why I am still afraid of basements.

I have not forgiven these people – although I admit that I can’t even remember their name. I cannot imagine what kind of bully the boy grew up to be based on his demeanor at age 6.

I have not forgiven Allen Crawford - a former boss that hit on me. I had not been in a situation like that before. It completely ruined my image of authority figures and for the first time made me really, really hate my job. Interestingly enough, this has happened several times since then, but that time was the first, therefore is the receiver of the bulk of my anger. I think the difference is that now I am prepared for it – am more mature and have a lot of experience behind me. This makes it easier to diffuse these situations when/if they do arise.

I have not forgiven myself – for many, many, many mistakes I have made over the years. No matter what happens in my life it seems that it is hardest to forgive myself.