She was 4 years old. A quiet little girl who lived in a world mostly inside her head. She played with her dolls a lot, pretending to belong to a much bigger, happier world than the one she really lived in. Her brother went to school all day, and her mother worked nights, leaving the little at a friend’s house during the mornings so that she could get some sleep before work each evening.
It was at this friend’s house that the little girl’s world changed.
The friend had two boys. The little boy was a year younger than the little girl. The big boy was 7, the same age as the little girl’s older brother. Sometimes the little girl would play with the little boy, but most of the time she hid in the sofa pillows and played with her dolls. When her brother and the big boy came back after school, she would try to play with them, but usually was told that she was too little to do whatever activity they were about to head off for. She had been left behind when they went riding bikes at the park, flying a kite with the older boys down the street, sneaking through the alleys looking for treasures in people’s trash, playing hide and seek in the garages on the street.
The little girl did not get along very well with the big boy. He did not like girls, and did not like little girls most of all. One afternoon the little girl heard the big boy and her brother talking about a birthday party. It sounded fun and she wanted to go. There were going to be go-carts and pizza and cake and it sounded like everyone from the neighborhood would be there. It would be the biggest party she had ever been to. The thought of all of those people scared her a little, but she wanted to go anyway and decided to ask the big boy about the party… He made it very clear that she was not invited and left her to play alone with her dolls. And the little girl was sad.
A few days later the boy’s mom called the little girl into the living room. There in the middle of the room was the big boy, standing and staring straight at her. No real expression appeared to be on his face. He was just standing there, looking at the little girl.
The mom told the little girl that her son was having a birthday party. She then told the little girl that she was not invited because the big boy did not want her to go to his party. She asked the little girl how she felt about this.
After a long time, not sure how to answer the question, the little girl said that it made her sad.
There was silence for a short time and then the mother told the big boy to tell the little girl that he didn’t want her at his party.
The big boy walked right up to the little girl and yelled in her face, “I don’t want you to go to my party. You are too little and I don’t like you”
The mom watched and said nothing.
The little girl just stood there.
The little boy pushed the little girl and yelled again, “You can’t go to my party”
The mom watched and said nothing.
The little girl continued standing there, very confused and scared.
The little boy punched the little girl in the face and screamed “You are not going to go to my party even if it makes you sad”
The mom watched and said nothing.
The little girl held back tears, her cheek and eye stinging.
The mom and boy left the little girl standing there in the middle of the room, tears streaming down her face.
And little girl went and hid in the pillows and played with her dolls pretending to belong to a much bigger, happier world than the one she really lived in.