Salt in my Margarita

As I lay in bed yesterday morning, I contemplated getting up and running. It was 5:00am. Although I wanted to start the day with a nice ass-kicking run, I decided against it and lazily got ready for work. Yep – you heard right. I carted my sorry ass into work yesterday. I call it a sorry ass because by 2:15pm when I left that place, I was sorry I had gone at all.

Now – let me just say that everyone was VERY NICE to me…they even had a little party to welcome me back. But the sheer torment endured throughout the day with various complaints and escalations really took its toll on me. By 6:30 yesterday evening I was ready for bed. For the night. I managed to make it until 8:00 and then put the boys to bed, but was barely awake by 8:30 and out cold by 9:30.

5:00am this morning I looked at the clock, briefly considered running, and then laughed at the insanity of the idea. I didn’t run. I didn’t even get up. I stayed in bed until 6:15 when I finally had no choice but to get up and get ready. This whole working thing can bite my ass – it sucks.

I plan to run later this afternoon after work. Shall we take bets on how likely that is to happen? No – too easy.

On a positive note, we are going on vacation tomorrow morning (at the ass-crack of dawn mind you) to the Dominican Republic. I plan to lay around on the beach, help the boys collect shells, and contemplate the sand that will inevitably end up in my belly button. That should all pass the time quite nicely, don’t you think? I wish I could say that every night after the boys go to sleep I planned to open a bottle of wine and get pleasantly tipsy, but those drinking days are over. Which makes me a tiny bit sad.

I am really surprised at HOW MUCH NOT DRINKING is driving me insane. It is so much harder for me than it seems to be for my husband. I am not sure a day goes by without me thinking longingly about a margarita or a glass of wine or a ice cold beer.

Here is a taste of just how much I think about drinking: While driving into work this morning I was listening to the Spin Doctors “Revenge is sweet, but success is sweeter. I took the salt from my wounds, and put them in my margarita.” And I swear I sat there thinking “mmmmm, margaritas” – at 7:30 in the morning. Please send help. Or a margarita. I swear I will only LOOK at it. I won't drink it. As far as you know.