Normal Is...

1. being adopted and growing up always knowing this fact
2. being surrounded by your mothers hippie boyfriends who ride motorcyles after she is divorced
3. breaking your toe when your brother drops a crowbar on at, when you are 4 years old
4. hiding in the fireplace with your brother so that the babysitter cannot find you and has to call your mother to come from her first date after her divorce
5. telling your grandmotherly-like babysitter to shut up and getting your mouth washed out with soap
6. watching your brother get in a fight when you are in first grade and jumping in to help, giving the bully a bloody nose
7. fighting with your brother over Brady Bunch vs. Star Trek, and losing. Every. Time.
8. staging a pretend wedding complete with presents and guest for your 10 year old brother and his girlfriend
9. not remembering a single day of your mother's second marriage that lasted 6 months
10. moving in with another family in 4th grade to become part of a religious disaster
11. moving out of said religious disaster 6 months later and into the most horrible neighborhood imaginable
12. having to refinish the worlds most beat-up house with your mom and brother at the age of 10, including taking down walls, stripping wallpaper, and tearing down a garage
13. getting sent to the good schools, 45 minutes across town and arriving to a pack of screaming and angry parents that didn't want the poor kids there
14. watching your brother get sent to a school for bad kids because your mom can't control him anymore
15. working at McDonalds for two weeks and then quitting because 5:00 am is just too early to be at work on the weekends
16. having parties when your mother is working nights, getting caught, and almost sent to a private school
17. having the private school your mother wants to send you to turn you down because they will only have a year to reform you AND they are sure it will take longer than that
18. not dating in high school because you are ashamed of where you live
19. having to pick a suspect out of a lineup after he stole a diamond ring from your work (by swallowing it and running away)
20. recognizing 2 police officers in above lineup
21. getting in an accident in your mother's car the very first she lets you drive it all by yourself
22. having to stay at home your first year of college so that you can save money to go away next year
23. hating college your second year because you are so far away from home
24. living with your boyfriend and his parents for a summer and working two jobs so that you never have to be around his mother
25. marrying above boyfriend and never ever liking his mother
26. having your mother die two months before your first child is born
27. having a baby three months early weighing in at 2.2 pounds
28. meeting your soul mate while married to someone else
29. leaving your husband and giving up up full custody of your children to be with your true love
30. regretting giving up full custody of your children years later when your ex husband turns into an evil, horrible person thanks to his new girlfriend
31. falling in love with stray animals everywhere and wanting to adopt one from Greece, but having your husband think adopting foreign animals is a bit extream when there are so many in the states that need homes
32. finding the absolute worst looking, sickest dog in Texas and adopting it
33. letting your job drive you over the edge of crazy
34. thinking cows are the most awesome animals and mooing at them every time they are within sight
35. being a vegetarian for years and then going on the Atkins diet
36. wanting another baby at 36 years old
37. feeling normal and totally NOT normal at the same time