I am the one who:

• Has always wanted a father in my life
• Never quite fit in anywhere
• Does not like to get very close to people
• Does not talk about feelings
• Is afraid to be excited for fear of the ‘big let-down’
• Wants to have a baby
• Loves my life
• Has trouble focusing on large tasks
• Talks in circles when confused or in over my head
• Doesn’t like to have secrets
• Says exactly what I think exactly when I am thinking it
• Could not be worse at numbers
• Wants to be so much better at everything than I am at the moment
• Puts way too much importance on my job
• Manages to get in way over my head and then I don’t know how to get out of ‘the difficult situation’
• Does not want to hurt anyone
• Wants my daughters to be happy
• Cannot believe what a wonderful life I have and wonder how I ended up with this one...instead of one of the billions of other lives that people end up with
• Loves to think
• Can NEVER sleep
• Gets hurt feelings so easily
• Has always wanted green eyes and blonde hair
• Is filled with so much regret
• Feels little on the inside even though I am an adult on the outside
• Gets sucked into reading online journals for hours and hours and then is left with swimmy head and no motivation to do much of anything
• Can procrastinate until the last possible moment
• Wonders why I do the things I do
• Pretends I would make many different decisions if I could live my life over again but knows that I would live most of it over again, because the outcome has been worth all of the mistakes
• Wishes I had finished college
• Can never picture tomorrow in my head