I found it incredibly difficult to sleep the past two nights, and I think it has to do with my return to running. I have not been running much, but considering I have been mostly stationary for almost a year, this must count for something. The thing I remember from the days of my long runs when training, was that every time I would increase my mileage or speed or simply intensity in training, I would have trouble settling down at night. It took a few days to adjust to the added stress put on my body, and then I would sleep like manatee. What? Manatees sleep a lot. I know. I Googled it.
So I am thinking that in a day or two the no-sleeping thing will back the fuck off already. I am hoping anyway. Because the no sleeping? It is not translating into not being tired. Oh no. I am exhausted, but simply cannot sleep. It is like there are gallons of caffeine coursing through my limbs, making me all jumpy and unable to sit still, but the stuff has not hit my brain, because it is sitting in my head like a tired, sad lump – just wanting to sleep already. So there is that. We DO have that.
And speaking of the return to running, I made an executive decision to not run today, and am already thinking I will change my mind. See, I have a crazy-busy day full of meetings and internet surfing and picking up kids and internet surfing and work email and not so important email and sandal buying (requiring internet surfing) – and I just don’t know if I can fit it all in. Ummm, yeah.
So as I looked at my workload and my list of to-do items, I couldn’t see any reason why I cannot run this evening other than I am lazy and wanted to blame work, when in reality it is not a busy work day for a change. And if I can just get out and run I KNOW I will not regret that…but staying home and sitting on my ass has so many ways of making me feel guilt and regret that I am now thinking that staying home on my ass = lame idea that only a lazy lamo person would consider.