Torn

I am in my office today. It is FREEZING in here. 90 degrees outside and sub-zero in here. Makings of a cold? I think so. I believe the climate in here is inhibiting my ability to work…either that or the fact that I am extremely lazy. Thoughts?

My husband is considering a job in another state – far away. We are talking about moving. We were prepared to move to Austin around the first of the year, but based on this new information, it looks like I will be looking for a new job at another company in a state far, far away. We talked to the girls about this a while ago and they were OK with the move – they would still see us every other weekend as we would fly them out and back. However we would not see them during the week. I am guessing that if I were to ask my youngest daughter today what she thinks of this idea, she would begin crying and beg us to stay or take her with us. I know my oldest daughter would want to go if she didn’t have to upset her dad in doing so…

What am I to do? If we do start up custody battles it could mean the deterioration of the very fragile relationship that I have with their dad now. It could also lead to the girls not having much of a relationship with their father. Although, come to think of it – they are not all that fond of him these days. He works a lot and when he is home he is focused on his wife, and not the kids. They are not happy about their step-brothers most of the time and have a very ‘iffy’ relationship with their step-mom.

I would love to be able to reasonably talk to their dad and work out an arrangement where the girls can be wherever they want – or at least allow more time with me, since that is what they want right now. However I know that he will not be receptive to this. I think he is worried about losing the money that I pay him every month. He can keep the $1200.00 if I can just have the girls with me more. I would also pay for them to come see him every other weekend and arranged holidays…. But – I know that he is worried that the courts would not enforce my paying him and he would NEVER want to lose that money. Then his wife would have to get off her butt and get a job. What would she do if she couldn’t sit around all day staring at the pool boy and watching Dr. Phil?

What would you do?