I know that I have written this before – it is so fresh in my mind…but I am too lazy to look for it and really don’t care.
Do you know that wonderful nostalgic feeling that can sometimes hit you when you hear a song from your past, drive through your old neighborhood, or see someone you used to know so well? I love that feeling… it makes me feel warm all over, familiar, content. I cannot explain how it feels, but I want to. I want to put on paper what that feeling is so that someday when I cannot grasp it, I can read about it and remember exactly how it feels. I have never been very good with word pictures – never seem to be able to express things I feel as well as I can feel them. I suppose that is what makes writing a talent…one I wish dearly that I possessed.
Yesterday driving home I had that old familiar feeling, and I don't even know why. It wasn't the song on the radio, or the area of town I was in. I hadn't run into an old friend or even come across anything particularly familiar - but it hit me like a ton of bricks...that content, happy, nastalgic feeling. Perhaps it was because it was warm, sunny, and a storm was headed in - giving the air that funny smell. Perhaps it was because I was headed home early looking foward to spending time with the boys. Perhaps it was just a good day. I only hope I have more of those.
************
Yesterday I took the boys to the “big park” which is not too far from our house. They have soccer fields, baseball fields, two jungle jims, volleyball nets and picnic facilities. They also have a pond. With ducks. Lots of ducks. Ducks that LOVE to eat bread. So – we took bread for the ducks. I let the boys run around feeding the ducks until a ½ loaf of bread was gone – which took a while since they kept giving them one tiny piece at a time. Cole would chase the ducks until they would take the bread from him, which surprised me. I assumed he would be afraid, but he was so NOT afraid that it frightened me a little. I don’t want to be that mother. You know the kind - the one that lets her kids get pecked to death by ducks. But – I also don’t want to be the over-reacting clingy mom with two girly-boys (which I totally am) so I tried to let them have fun. It almost killed me.
After feeding the already fat ducks, I let them walk around the pond. Letting them do this nearly killed me too. I kept envisioning the boys running head-first into the water and drowning – which is crazy…because I would help them before they got hurt and how would they run head first anyway? There are toddlers, they would fall at least 6 times before they got there – but my mind is insane and thus I kept worrying. I managed to keep my worrying to myself (sort of) and let them have fun. Roark would run ahead, stop, turn around to face me and announce, “RUNNING” with a huge grin on his face. Cole would try to run too, but would fall or stub his toes. He ended up with a bloody toe and knee, but didn’t want to stop trying to run. It was hilarious! And cute. Much of the cute.
On the way home they were both thirsty so I let them take turns with my water bottle. Every time we would get to a stop sign I would make them switch and let the other boy have it. It was a riot to get to a stop sign, have them recognize it, yell “STOP” and hand over the water… or try to hide it so they could keep it. I just love this stage of their development – everything they do is cute, funny, or a riot (sometimes in an annoying sort of way). Roark has started putting words together and even making some words up. Cole is beginning to talk more, and they are both so expressive. I wouldn’t mind staying at this age for a while.